How to Quit Seeking Approval and Just Get Started

If you realllly think about it, have you been waiting on someone or something or a certain time before getting started on what you really want? I had this wild realization lately that:

Whatever I Want in Life is Up to Me

It seems obvious, right? I mean, honestly, it does. I can’t believe I hadn’t thought of things this way before and think my goal list would’ve been a bit different if I had.

These thoughts actually started last year when I was told over breakfast that I should “buy a house because it’s a good investment.” In my mind, I was a little flabbergasted. Do you guys know the housing prices in Jackson? A double-wide on a 1/4 acre goes for 750K…three years ago. I know this because my place sold - ha. However, that means it’s way higher than that now! So I don’t feel totally bad to say it bothered me that someone nonchalantly decided to tell a growing artist to buy a Jackson house.

But then I was bothered that that bothered me. First, I hate the idea of the mindset where I limit myself. (So obviously, a cabin is on my goal list this year) and secondly, it made me think about why I had never considered buying a house before. Sure, I didn’t have that cash floating around but why was it never even on my radar of possibilities?

Why not? Funny enough, I realized I was waiting to think about it til I got married. That I had developed this mindset from seeing it played out by everyone I grew up around and many of my friends. Go to college, get a boyfriend, get married, get the house, have the kids. And most of my friends that aren’t married, rent. So for me, since I was never around the idea of buying a house solo, it hard seriously never really crossed my mind.

Now tell me, can you think of anything in your life that you don’t even realize you’re holding out on? Maybe it’s a big move, or starting a business, or trying a new activity.

You don’t need anyone's approval

I’ll say it again for the chica who’s also looking at Insta…you don’t need anyone’s approval to start or get what you want! Realizing this can honestly be a game-changer. You don’t need approval to feel okay about making more money than the rest of your family. You don’t need approval to take up a new sport. You don’t need approval to get a nose job if you hate your nose.

This is your life and no one cares about your life more than you do. Honestly. The faster you realize that your life is your responsibility, the faster you’ll get exactly what you want!

Who and what you're around matters

Changing a mindset is tough work though. Especially if you’re around people who don’t think the same. Just like how all the people I was around growing up shaped my thoughts, all of our thoughts are shaped daily without us even noticing!

That’s why it’s 100,000,000x important to take account of who you’re around and what thoughts you’re letting into your head. Are they making you a better person? Are they leading you towards your goals and dreams? Are they holding you back in some way?

Take a completely honest account of what’s influencing you and then make necessary changes. No, ya don’t have to throw all your wine drinking friends to the curb, but maybe change the conversation over wine. This will make a huge difference and you’ll notice in time.

Stop Making Excuses

Here’s the caveat to doing exactly what you want without approval: you can’t use any more excuses. That’s right, your life is up to you now and you’re gonna have to stop saying you’re waiting on so-and-so to go try a new restaurant or waiting til your mom’s onboard to start taking up those business classes.

I think this is my favorite thing about the whole thing, because taking a good, hard look at the excuses we use daily really puts us in our place and makes us super accountable to our goals. The last thing we want to do is let ourselves down, am I right?

Let me know in the comments what one thing came to mind for you - something you’ve been putting off and didn’t even realize what you were waiting for until now.